Markasaurus

I was economically stimulated by GW Bush this afternoon.

So you finally got your economic stimulus check. I received mine this afternoon. Thanks to a very high social security number, I was one of the last people in the US to get “paid.” I’ve been looking forward to it for months, mostly so I could write this post. This was even more exciting than the last time our illustrious president attempted to bribe the American public, way back in 2001:

So now that you have your payment, what are you going to do with it? If you aren’t going to either buy groceries, gas or pay off (some) of you debt, what would be a good way to spend it? I’ve come up with a few ways you could spend it and not give in to the idea that handing out $600 checks will significantly revive our economy:

• Ride your bike or walk to Canada or Mexico or spend it on booze and strippers. Make sure to cash your check before leaving home. If you drive, you’ll get stuck paying for gas and tolls.
• Cash the check and buy something used on Craigslist. Make sure you don’t pay taxes.
• Frame the check as a keepsake. This (obviously) is not as fun as the first two.

What’s the best thing you could really do with your check? Invest it. In ten years you’ll have $1,420 if you get a 9% rate of return in the stock market. Or you’ll have over $3,300 if you keep it in the market for 20 years. Better yet, take it Reno and you can double your money in five minutes.

This entry was posted on Monday, July 14th, 2008 at 11:09 pm and is filed under America!, news, politics, ranting. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.